i am the seedless pumpkin you left out on the front porch in the cold morning sun to rot simply because you had completely forgotten about me. all i want is for you to carve me inside and out. to make me feel at the least bit beautiful for just this instant so i won't be entirely misplaced in your memory. all i want is for to hold me in your tired arms when reasoning gives way to those interminable doubts. if only i had just that one particular chance of a lifetime i'd carve your pretty eyes out to make them hollow just like mine.

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